Caring for elderly parents is one of the most challenging tasks many of us will face. As our parents age, it often becomes our responsibility to provide the care they need. While this can be an incredibly rewarding experience, it’s also emotionally and physically taxing. Being prepared with a plan as a caregiver can make the process more manageable and help reduce stress.

What Does It Mean to Be an Elderly Caregiver?

An elderly caregiver is someone who helps older individuals with their daily needs. This often includes managing medications, attending medical appointments, preparing meals and handling household chores. Many caregivers also handle financial responsibilities, like paying bills and managing insurance.

This level of care can quickly become overwhelming, especially when juggling work, family life and other commitments. That’s why having a plan is so important. It allows you to anticipate the challenges ahead and find ways to balance caregiving with your other responsibilities.

What Can Estate Planning Attorneys Do to Help Caregivers?

Estate planning attorneys play a crucial role in helping families prepare for the future. They can assist with creating legal documents, such as powers of attorney, advance healthcare directives, and trusts. These tools can help ensure that you have the authority to make important decisions on behalf of your loved one when the time comes.

Caring for Elderly Parents Needs to Start with a Plan for Self-Care

Sophia A. Nelson, a writer, consultant and attorney herself, shared her personal experience caring for her aging mother in a recent CNN article. She described how she became her mother’s primary caregiver when a case of COVID-19 made it impossible for her to care for herself. Nelson took on the role of caregiver, while also managing her full-time job, running her household and trying to maintain her health.

Like many caregivers, Nelson eventually became overwhelmed and fell ill herself. She realized that while it was essential to care for her mother, she couldn’t neglect her own health. Nelson’s story reminds us how caregiving can take a toll on physical and mental health and how taking care of others also requires taking care of yourself.

To avoid burnout, caregivers should seek support from other family members, hire professional help when needed and make time for their own health and well-being.

Steve Guttenberg’s Caregiving Story

A name you may be more familiar with that has a caregiving story to tell is Steve Guttenberg. The Hollywood actor from movies such as “Three Men and a Baby” and the “Police Academy” series took weekly road trips from Los Angeles to visit his father in Arizona during his father’s last years and chronicles his experiences in life and caregiving in his recent book, “Time to Thank; Caregiving for My Hero.”

In his book, Guttenberg tells a similar store to Sophia A. Nelson, and in an interview with Richard Eisenberg from Next Avenue he delves into what it’s like to take care of somebody who’s sick, to make them food, to feed them. What it’s like to put their pajamas on, to make sure they’re safe in the shower, to take them to the bathroom. What it’s like when you find yourself in a room with someone who’s very ill or needs help and it’s just you and them for the most part. Guttenberg says he wrote the book so he could connect with other caregivers and say, “I know what it’s like. You know what it’s like. We’re together. We’re one. We’re an army of 53 million.”

What Should You Include in a Caregiving Plan?

A comprehensive caregiving plan includes several key elements to help ensure that your loved one receives the care they need without overwhelming you:

  • Legal Documents: Work with an estate planning attorney to create powers of attorney, healthcare directives and other necessary legal documents.
  • Financial Planning: Ensure that your parent has a plan to cover long-term care costs. This may include Medicaid planning or other financial strategies.
  • Daily Care Plan: Determine what daily tasks your loved one will need help with and how those will be managed.
  • Support System: Identify family members, friends, or professional caregivers who can help share the responsibilities.

How Can You Maintain Self-Care as a Caregiver?

While caregiving can feel all-consuming, it’s important to make time for yourself. This might include setting aside time daily to exercise, meditate, or engage in a hobby you enjoy. It’s also important to establish boundaries and ask for help when you need it.

Regular breaks are essential for mental and physical health. Whether you hire a part-time caregiver or ask a family member to step in, finding ways to lighten your load is key to avoiding caregiver burnout.

Start Planning for Elder Care and Protect Your Well-Being Today

If you are a caregiver for an elderly parent or expect to be one in the future, now is the time to start planning. Contact our office today to schedule a consultation with an estate planning attorney who can help you navigate caregiving’s legal and financial aspects. We’ll work with you to create a plan that supports both your loved one’s needs and your well-being.

Key Takeaways:

  • Prepare for caregiving: Creating a comprehensive plan for caregiving can reduce stress and provide peace of mind.
  • Seek legal guidance: An elder law attorney can help you create the necessary legal documents and explore financial options.
  • Maintain self-care: Balancing caregiving responsibilities with self-care is essential to avoid burnout and protect your own health.
  • Share the load: Identify a support system, including family members and professionals, to share caregiving responsibilities.
  • Plan for financial security: Understanding Medicare, Medicaid and long-term care planning can safeguard your family’s future.

Frankel Rubin’s attorneys are licensed in Missouri and Illinois and our law firm services all of the St. Louis Metropolitan Area. We are especially convenient for estate planning in Clayton, Brentwood, Des Peres, Frontenac, Glendale, Webster Groves, Kirkwood, Ladue, Maplewood, Olivette, Overland, Richmond Heights, Rock Hill, Shrewsbury, Town and Country, Creve Coeur, Affton, Crestwood, Sappington, Sunset Hills, Maryland Heights, University City, Warson Woods, and St. Louis City.

Reference: CNN (Feb. 15, 2023) “Caring for Aging Parents: Why Planning for Self-Care is Essential“